10 Things That Are Typisch Deutsch - A Foreigner’s Perspective

“Typisch Deutsch”, for those uninitiated in the septic waste tank of German “culture”, is something that is typically German. If you ask a typical German what typisch Deutsch implies, you will get the usual conventional answers, like bratwurst, punctuality, sarcasm, Oktoberfest, etc. 

Every initiate into German “culture” is aware of these typical lists which purport to define what exactly “Typisch Deutsch” actually is,

and not surprisingly most of these lists simply repeat the same things over and over as if they are trying to program into our minds what being German actually means to the Germans themselves. Every list I have come across of things that are typical German have been made by Germans and are by default, lacking true insight, uninformed, self-centered, and way off the mark essentially.

 

I mean to say that Germans on the whole are dishonest, incapable of self-reflection, and completely disregard the interests and wishes of others where their own interests are concerned. 

For once I would like to read a list of characteristics that are typical German that is made by a more objective and honest foreign perspective. Since I have been unable to come across such a list, I have decided to make my own.

 

Things That I Find To Be Typisch Deutsch

1. Unsubstantiated Superiority Complex Based on Nazism. 

After losing two world wars you would think that the Germans would have swallowed some humble pie by now and realized that Hitler was lying to them about their supposed genetic superiority. His lie was two-fold in nature because in it he, convinced the Germans that they are a homogenous group of people which they are not.

2. Willfull Ignorance

Good luck trying to get a German to admit his/her faults. Germans are not only comfortable speaking ignorantly of their own culture and history, but they are equally as comfortable speaking ignorantly of your culture and history and as if they know your own country and culture

better than you. Germans always know better than you even when they clearly don’t. But don’t waste your time trying to show them the light by casting pearls before literal swine. Ignorance is bliss as they say. Germans are never wrong, don’t try to convince them otherwise unless you like wasting your time.

3. Schadenfreude

If you ever wondered where the urban slang “throwing ‘shade’ at someone” comes from, look no further than “schadenfreude”. Talk to any German and they will make it seem like it’s innocent and harmless, but if you are looking for the truth, don’t ask a German. Schadenfreude is actually evil and a very sinister behavior commonly exhibited by sadists who receive enjoyment through inflicting pain and destroying the lives of others. 

4. Aggressive, Reckless Driving

If there is one thing that truly terrifies me about Germany, it’s the thought of riding a bicycle on the streets of any of it’s supposedly bike friendly cities. Riding a bike in any major German city essentially means putting your life and limb at constant risk with every ride. Road rage is rampant in Germany. Drivers will rarely if ever give anyone the right of way or yield. I have a strong feeling that drivers in Germany will intentionally hit a pedestrian or cyclist if the driver feels that he/she is completely observing the traffic rules and the pedestrian/cyclist is in the wrong. And German drivers would do so in order to add an exclamation point and to tell you off while in an injured state that you were wrong and thus deserved to be hit and injured by them. Sick bastards indeed.

5. Lack of Empathy

The reason why Germans are recognized the world over for their cold hearts and disposition, is precisely because they lack empathy. 

If it seems like I am profiling the traits of a psychopath by now at this point in the article, congratulations! You are paying attention! 
If you are in need of help in Germany, good luck finding a German to help. For some reason it’s programmed in their nature to flee when they sense that others are in need of help. A foreigner in Germany would be more sympathetic and helpful to someone in need than a German in most cases. Without foreigners, Germany would be completely unlivable in my humble opinion, and the foreigners here add whatever texture and humanity there is to the country. 

 

6. Tendency Towards Paganism/Old Religion

Germany is far from a God fearing country. The Germans reject the Bible for the most part as Germans view it a something of the Hebrews (non-Germans), so they can’t relate to it. Christ was not a German at the center of a German universe so He has little appeal among the Germans.

In the self-centered world of the typical German, Wotan is god and Wotanism the prevailing religion. Germans are overwhelmingly pagan with a strong inclination towards witchcraft and sorcery. Nature spirits are revered and music from groups such as FAUN whose views on each of their videos number in the tens of millions, are a testament to the spell of paganism and idol worship that the Germans are under. 

”Fauns” were the satyrs (half-goat and half-man) creatures of Greek and Roman mythology. Pan who represents the Baphomet or Satan is also known as Faunus, and not surprisingly, Pan features heavily in the music videos of FAUN leaving no doubt as to who they worship. This is the type of spiritualism that maintains a hold over Germany and can explain much of the spiritual and moral degeneracy prevalent in German society.

 

7. Sexual and Moral Perversion 

I shudder when I think about the depths of German depravity. Sexual crimes against children are “punishable” by a slap on the wrist sentence of a maximum of 3 years in prison. Child molesters and sexual predators have their identities protected by the state and they don’t carry quite the same social stigma and isolation that they do in the USA. So sexual perverts roam freely about the country and have their way with their victims knowing that if they are caught only a light punishment awaits them.

Prostitution is legal and often brothels are located a stone’s throw away from schools and kindergartens.

Morally speaking, there is a distinct German tendency to gaslight and try to make black seem white and white seem black, which is essentially a perversion of the truth. When you fail to see their perverted “truth” you are made to be the problem. This also occurs especially in institutional settings where a group of Germans decides to form a mob in order to take out a particular non-German target.

In Germany, morality is simple - The German ends justify the German means. 

 

8. Laziness, Apathy

Try to get a German to do a job you paid them good, hard-earned money to do, and see if you don’t get treated like a favor is being done for you. That’s if you can reach the German, chances are that German is either on vacation, on sick leave, taking a cigarette break, and many times doing all three things at the same time! If you think I am joking, you have never had to hire a German lawyer, go to court or anything of the sort. 

Even getting some lowly store clerk with minimal education to help you or answer your questions while you attempt to spend your hard-earned money at the store which employs them will be a job unto itself, which will often leave you feeling insulted and ignored. 

I never got the impression that Germans are hard workers or even meticulous as the Germans themselves often proclaim. Another trait of personality disordered individuals is also a strong sense of entitlement, which most Germans have. I do get the impression that they feel like everything should be handed to them just for being German in Germany, which leads me to number nine on the list.

 

9. Smugness

The worst kind of person you will ever meet is a smug German. What has a German got to be proud of in all truthfulness? Their most famous export which they are known for around the world is Nazism. Great accomplishment. They are also famous for getting bombed to smithereens and badly losing two world wars. One gets the idea that perhaps the facade of German superiority is a contrived defense mechanism to shield their weak psyches from the fact that they are actually losers in every sense of the word. It is no wonder that nature via God has rendered them incapable of reproducing among themselves. So much for the Nazi idea of German genetic superiority, especially when the population needs to rely on foreigners and immigration to sustain itself. 

 

10. Financial Corruption/Beggar Thy Neighbor Economic Policies i.e. The Euro Currency

There are few nations in the world that tax its inhabitants 50% of their income, Germany is one of them. On top of that there is a VAT of 20% on purchases of goods and services, which is also gouging to the taxpayers. When you add monthly taxes for tv/radio/internet into the mix, the tax burden has fully moved into the realm of absurd levels. God forbid you have to pay child maintenance payments and also rent and your own bills, and one can quickly see how even maintaining a normal life in Germany can be financially crippling to many workers. 

And this is only the financial corruption on the individual level. On the institutional level, there are banks like Deutsche Bank, who has had their fingers in every financial crisis of recent memory from the stock market collapse of 2009, with their multi-billions worth of toxic derivatives, to the Greek financial crisis which forced the Greeks to be on the hook for corrupt, interest generating loans issued by German banks at the price of harsh Greek austerity measures. 

Germans complain about the Greeks while profiting from the German created misery in Greece. This is truly evil. 

Domestically, there is the Berlin airport money grab where billions of dollars were fleeced from the taxpayers in an epic scandal that has been made light of by the state controlled German media. None of the real players were punished in typical German fashion, and a couple of mid-level fall guys took the heat for the real criminals.

Corruption in Germany stinks to high heaven. What is even more astounding is the fact that the NGO responsible for tracking worldwide government corruption has its headquarters in Berlin, which is staffed mainly by Germans. No wonder Germany always receives such stellar remarks whenever government corruption is mentioned, since the Germans likely fund and sponsor the NGO in the first place! 

Germany has consistently proven that it can only rise and produce at the detriment of other countries. Look no further than the € as proof of this. The only country that has received any significant benefit from the euro currency is Germany. The reason being that as an export based economy which depends on economic trade imbalances with other countries such as the USA, where Germans basically dump all of their exports, while limiting their trade partners’ imports, Germany needs a low value currency to make their exports cheaper and more attractive.

The Euro allowed the Germans to essentially devalue their currency while simultaneously making life more expensive in the smaller Eurozone countries with less robust export economies. Ask any Greek whether life was more expensive before or after the Drachma and that Greek will corroborate my sentiments. Ask the typical Greek what they think about the typical German if you want to be entertained and know what they really think about the Germans! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3 comments

  • @ Enttäuschter Zigeuner – exactly! Thank you for reading!

    @ Liz – thank you for reading! I have a lot more to tell so please stay tuned for more insight into the peculiar, disgusting German Volk!

    Admin
  • I agree with most of what is written here.
    For the life of me I cannot wrap my mind around the fact that so many people still think of Germany as some sort of promised land for expats. It is a moral cesspool full of sick people. The society is a failed experiment in diversity that has Germans doing all sorts of things to look different (nose rings, tattoos, dreadlocks, mate drinks, indie music taste) while managing to look and behave the same, and foreigners either willingly or forcefully building societies of their own either to avoid Germans or because they have no choice.

    Forget about ascending the social ladder. Germans are not known for being empathetic, nor helpful. They are a nation of workers and followers. They will do whatever the rules say, even if the rules make no sense at all.

    Perhaps the most disgusting people I have encountered in terms of personal hygiene. But God forbid you didn’t sweep the floor on the “sweep the floors day” or forgot to do the laundry on the “do your laundry the way we say so” day.

    The constant references to scatological acts in everyday language are both disgusting and unnecessary.

    The weather brings you down, German food is nothing to write home about, the people are a catastrophe, and the insane taxes are barely an incentive.

    I am so glad I left that hellhole. Nie wieder Deutschland!

    Enttäuschter Zigeuner
  • i haven’t been in germany for as long as you, just a few years, but already after the first year and a half i started to get this eerie feeling about germans that i couldn’t pinpoint, but nevertheless couldn’t shake off. My experience has been that 95% germans i’ve come across just seem to be very “off” in some major way.

    I’ve tried to explain my feelings/perception to other friends but the only way i could put it was “they just feel weird/ i can’t connect with them, they’re like robots/ there’s something missing slash not right about them.” It’s been very disappointing because when i first came to Germany, i had such high hopes and i tried to remain open-minded, but i’m a highly sensitive person that is super sensitive to people’s energy, so it’s something that’s been difficult to ignore and just sweep under the rug. So basically, in less than two years, i went from being very excited and starry eyed about living here to resigning myself to only dealing with germans on a need-to basis and keep it as superficial as possible even then because i find their energy so unpleasant and uncomfortable to be around.

    I would be interested in your insights, if you have any, as to what precisely is the cause of their abnormal-ness.

    Luz

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